elcome to the ultimate collection of original Clint Eastwood audio clips showcasing many of Clint's greatest quotes and one-liners from over 45 years of film making.
As you will soon hear, Clint Eastwood truly has some of the best and most memorable lines in film ever.
All audio clips are available in RealAudio® format and can be accessed by clicking on either the "Real" icon or the file name. RealAudio® clips play best when using the latest RealPlayer.
This site currently has over 130 clips available which will certainly make your day!
"A lot of crap's coming down tonight, sir. You want to be a player or not. You want to know what happened that night, or don't ya. Cause I was there."
"Do you realize the skill of breaking the security of a security company? I don't know how those guys do it."
"He made a mistake. You made a mistake. When you went after my little girl, that was entirely unacceptable."
Biker : "Ain't gonna be no weenie roast! No this time, it's gonna be an ape roast! (Laughs)"
Philo : "Right turn, Clyde."
Clyde : "Ooog!"
Man : "You will have a visit from some of my friends very soon."
Philo : "Will they be driving Cadillac's too?"
Man : "Yes, long and black!"
Philo : "Clyde - scrap the caddy."
Robert : "You know I get the distinct feeling that I'm lost."
Francesca : "Are you supposed to be in Iowa?"
Robert : "Yeah."
Francesca : "Well then you're not that lost."
Robert : "I'm looking for a bridge, one of those covered bridges out in this neighborhood."
Francesca : "Roseman Bridge?"
Robert : "That's it."
Robert : "You caught me. I was just picking you some flowers."
Francesca : "Oh?"
Robert : "Men still do that, don't they? I'm not out of date am I? Picking flowers for a woman as a sign of appreciation?"
Francesca : "No not at all, except those are poisonous (laughs), I'm kidding!"
Francesca : (Phone rings) "Johnsons."
Robert : "Hi it's Robert."
Francesca : "Oh hi. Listen I'm running a little late, but I'll still be there."
Robert : "I don't want this to sound the wrong way, but I'm wondering if this is such a good idea."
Francesca : "Oh?"
Robert : "Yeah I had lunch in town today and I crossed paths with that Redfield woman.""
Francesca : "Oh, I guess you got the whole story."
Robert : "Yeah, the cashier at the grocery store was most generous."
Francesca : "Yeah, he's running for town crier next year."
Robert : "I learned more about the Dellaney affair than I knew about my own marriage. If it's gonna be a problem to see me tonight, don't feel pressured to do so. I'm sometimes not too bright about other people's reactions and I wouldn't want you to be put in an uncompromising situation."
Francesca : "Yeah I understand. It's very kind of you to think of that. Robert, I want to come. Ok? So I will meet you at the bridge like we planned so don't worry about the rest of it, I'm not."
Robert : "Alright. I'll see you then."
Francesca : "Ok. Bye."
Robert : "Bye."
Francesca : "What were you like when you were younger?"
Robert : "Trouble. Why?"
Francesca : "Just wondering. Why were you trouble?"
Robert : "I had a temper."
Francesca : "What were your parents like, your mother and father, hmm?"
Robert : "I don't know if I can do this ya know.""
Francesca : "What?"
Robert : "Try to cram a whole lifetime in between now and Friday."
Francesca : "I don't want you to say anything. I don't need you to say anything."
Robert : "I want you to stop this right now."
Francesca : "Fine. More eggs or shall we just f*ck on the linoleum one last time?"
Robert : "I'm not gonna be, I'm not gonna apologize for who I am. And I'm not gonna be made to feel like I've done something wrong here."
Francesca : "No you're not going to be made to feel anything, period, because you have carved out this little part for yourself in the world where you get to be voyeur, or a hermit, and a lover whenever you feel like it, and the rest of us are supposed to feel incredibly grateful for this brief moment that you've touched us. Go to hell! It isn't human not to be loved, it isn't human not to be afraid. You're a hypocrite and your a phony!"
Robert : "I don't want to need you."
Francesca : "What?"
Robert : "Cause I can't have you."
Robert : "Look, I'm gonna be here a few more days. We can talk later. We don't have to decide right now."
Francesca : "Robert don't, don't do this."
Robert : "I don't want to say goodbye right now. We don't have to make that decision. Maybe you'll change your mind. Maybe we'll see each other and you'll change your mind."
Francesca : "If that happens you have to decide because I can't."
Robert : "I'll only say this once. I've never said it before. This kind of certainty comes but just once in a lifetime."
Billy : "Don't ever tell and lie, and say your prayers at night before you go to bed. So as our friend south of the border would say, adios amigos!"
This clip comes from a cameo Clint did for the film Casper in 1995. His image appears in a bathroom mirror and he only has this one line - a takeoff from Unforgiven
Eastwood Apparition : "I'm gonna kill you! Your momma! And all her bridge playing friends!"
Murphy : "They wrote a song about you."
Lt. Speer : "Oh?"
Murphy : "Brother can you spare a brain."
Lt. Speer : "You want to know something."
Murphy : "What!"
Lt. Speer : "You'll always be shorty to me."
Taxi Driver : "That's $2.95 including the luggage."
Coogan : "Tell me how many stores are there named Bloomindales in this town?"
Taxi Driver : "One. Why?"
Coogan : "We passed it twice."
Taxi Driver : "It's still $2.95 including the luggage."
Coogan : "Yeah. Well here's $3.00 including the tip!"
"You forgot your fortune cookie. It says... you're sh*t out of luck."
"Well opinions are like assholes, everybody has one."
Chief : "Because if you want to stay on the street, you take Quan with you, to watch your back."
Harry : "Now hold on just a.."
Chief : "That's final!"
Harry : "Well that's just swell. Being that most of my partners end up in the hospital or dead. Why don't you ask Al how he feels about all that."
Chief : "What about it Quan? Any objections to working with Callahan here."
Quan : "I, uh, think I can handle it."
Harry : "Get a bulletproof vest, kid."
Harry : "Do you have any kids lieutenant?"
Lt. : "Me? No."
Harry : "Lucky for them."
Harry : "What you need is a job."
Jannero : "A what?"
Harry : "A job! I'm gonna give you a job as being a postman, understand? And it's gonna be your job to make sure the mail gets through. See that gorilla down there? That's Butcher Hicks...and he's killed three men, and you know how he did it? He tore 'em apart with his teeth. They didn't even find all the pieces. You might say he has an unhealthy appetite."
Jannero : "So what!"
Harry : "So Hicks there is my new pen pal. I'm gonna be sending him a letter once a week. I'm gonna be telling him how I'm gonna be looking in on his sick mother. And how I'm trying to get him special privileges here at the prison. And you know what's the interesting part? The interesting part is that if anything happens to me, and Hicks doesn't get his letter, he's going to be really pissed off and he's going to come down here and see you because your the mailman. In fact, he'll probably come down to this post office and cancel your ass like a stamp!"
Hicks : "That's it?"
Harry : "That's it. Oh, you see that dirt bag I was talking to down there. He says that smoking can cause cancer and anyone that smokes as much as you do is one dumb son-of-a-bitch."
Harry : "I don't like your list Swan. I don't like being on it."
Swan : "That's what this is really about isn't it. Well if you've got a charge to make..."
Harry : "Maybe I'll start my own deadpool and put you on it."
Swan : "Are you threatening me?"
Harry : "If you want to play the game you better know the rules, love."
Harry : "You're the last asshole Jennero sends after me."
Man : "Wait! You've got it all wrong!"
Harry : "Don't f*ck with me buddy. I'll kick your ass so hard you'll have to unbutton your collar to shit!"